School forms and husbands and beer, oh, my!

When you start thinking about having children of your own, you think of things like taking them to Disneyland, cuddling with them while you read them books, playing games together, teaching them to throw a baseball. No one tells you about cold, hard reality. Oh, they'll tell you the horrors of their birth experiences, sure. But nary a word comes your way about the best method of cleaning vomit out of car seats or the fact that you'll be spending a good amount of your time uttering things like, "Forks are not for combing your hair, dear," or "please don’t lick the bottom of your shoes," or, "we pee in toilets, not on lawns."

And the forms, dear God, the forms! Forms for the pediatrician, the eye doctor, the dentist, forms to sign them up for soccer, forms for school. It's bad enough, the multitude of forms you have to fill out for just one child. But multiply that by three, and now you're talking about entire forests being decimated, not to mention a permanently deformed hand from pressing through triplicate layers.

Tired of having hand cramps that take days to subside, this year I decided to bring in some help in the form of my husband. He just looked at me, rolled his eyes, and popped open another beer. I told him I was serious. I was not filling out all these forms, three times each, without help. I gave him the "Tell me about your child" form. He said no way. I told him it was either that ONE single-sided form or the THREE double-sided, repetitive, this information hasn't changed in nine years but I still have to fill it out, general information form. He grabbed the single form.

Five minutes later he handed it back to me. I thought that was rather quick considering he had to think about his child, what his strengths and weaknesses are, what the teacher should know to best help her guide our precious son through second grade.

Here's what he wrote:

Strengths:
Comedy, sarcasm, breeding discontent.
Generally well-behaved when not inciting riots.
Pretty good at math.

Areas of concern:
Humility
Needs practice writing, also.

Some questions I have:
Good luck!

I sure hope the teacher has a sense of humor.