We do birthday parties for the kids every other year. This preserves my pocketbook as well as my sanity. This year is a party year, Rose's birthday is fast approaching, and I have no idea what to do. I was starting to stress. And then I found this little sheet of paper laying around.
Birthday Party Plan
1. Meet at my house and play games.
2. Goof off, hang out.
3. Drive to Sky Zone.
4. Jump for as long as possible at Sky Zone.
5. Back to my house.
6. Open present, eat cake/ice cream.
7. Have accessorize time
- paint nails
-hair dos
8. Fashion/show off time
- dress up
- walk runway
9. Pajamas, brush teeth, etc.
10. Sing off.
11. Get in bed.
12. Stay up until late talking about girly stuff and boys.
Guess I don't need to worry. Rose has got it all covered.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
Doing it Right
S: Mom, can I ask you a question?
Me: Sure. What's up?
S: Did you and dad . . . do it . . . to get me?
Me: Do it?
S: You know.
Me: You mean sex?
S: MOM!
Me: Well, yes, of course we did.
S: . . . really?
Me: News flash, honey. Everyone in this world got here because people had sex.
S: MOM!
Me: What?
S: Don't say that word!
Me: Sex?
S: MOM!
Me: Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex.
S: (hands over ears) Stop it!
Me: Sweetie, you just learned one of life's little lessons.
S: What's that?
Me: You don't ever want to think about your parents having sex --
S: Ewww!
Me: -- and you don't want to think about your children having sex.
S: Mom, please say "doing it."
Me: That's why daddies often have trouble when their daughters come home after they've been married a while and announce they're pregnant. They can no longer ignore the fact that their daughter has, in fact, been having sex.
S: Well, my dad won't have that problem.
Me: Oh, really? Why not?
S: Because I'm adopting.
Me: But don't you plan on getting married someday?
S: Yes. But I'm sure we'll wait three or four years before we think about . . . you know.
Me: Sure. What's up?
S: Did you and dad . . . do it . . . to get me?
Me: Do it?
S: You know.
Me: You mean sex?
S: MOM!
Me: Well, yes, of course we did.
S: . . . really?
Me: News flash, honey. Everyone in this world got here because people had sex.
S: MOM!
Me: What?
S: Don't say that word!
Me: Sex?
S: MOM!
Me: Sex, sex, sex, sex, sex.
S: (hands over ears) Stop it!
Me: Sweetie, you just learned one of life's little lessons.
S: What's that?
Me: You don't ever want to think about your parents having sex --
S: Ewww!
Me: -- and you don't want to think about your children having sex.
S: Mom, please say "doing it."
Me: That's why daddies often have trouble when their daughters come home after they've been married a while and announce they're pregnant. They can no longer ignore the fact that their daughter has, in fact, been having sex.
S: Well, my dad won't have that problem.
Me: Oh, really? Why not?
S: Because I'm adopting.
Me: But don't you plan on getting married someday?
S: Yes. But I'm sure we'll wait three or four years before we think about . . . you know.
Side Effects May Include an Increased Tendency to be a Smart-Ass
David: Calvin, what happened to your face? You've got a really bad rash.
C: I don't know. The doctor said it was an allergic reaction to something.
Me: He's also been really lethargic all day. And he missed playing with his friends at school, so he seems a little depressed.
C: Cymbalta can help.
C: I don't know. The doctor said it was an allergic reaction to something.
Me: He's also been really lethargic all day. And he missed playing with his friends at school, so he seems a little depressed.
C: Cymbalta can help.
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